


Three Steps Ahead

by onebatch2batch



Category: The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M, Frank's not a creep, he's just in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-09
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2019-02-12 14:02:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,724
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12960897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onebatch2batch/pseuds/onebatch2batch
Summary: In which Frank doesn't have to has his guard up around Karen, and the one time he should have been more prepared.





	Three Steps Ahead

**Author's Note:**

> This one kind of got away from me. I tried to write in Frank's perspective since I don't see a lot of that. Enjoy!!

When Frank was in the Marines, he was always thinking three steps ahead. He had to, to survive. The instinct to think ahead was instrumental to his survival, and that instinct followed him back to the states. It was especially useful as the Punisher; evading the police, escaping Red’s lectures, and taking out those responsible for the death of his family, he was always three steps ahead. It came naturally to him, now. He even utilized the skill when doing the mundane; grocery shopping, getting coffee, taking a cab. He never put himself in a situation he couldn’t get out of.

Except when it came to Karen Page.

Sometimes it made him wonder, the way she could break down his walls and bring out the man in him, rather than the monster. He never had to be three steps ahead of her, couldn’t if he wanted to. She was too fuckin’ smart for that. It was one of the reasons he admired her, among many.

That’s why when he came through her door on a cold Friday night, he wasn’t expecting what he found. Usually when he arrived for their biweekly takeout dinner, she’s already got her flannel pajamas on, two glasses of wine deep. Frank pocketed the key she had made him ( _“I’m tired of you climbing through the window, Frank. Integrating back into society means we use doors.”_ ) and looked around, bewildered. It wasn’t like her to miss something like this, and he almost panicked until he realized there was a soft light coming from the bathroom. The door was propped open just enough that he could hear her humming from where he stood. Frank hesitated, unsure of how to proceed.

She was just changing into pajamas, he decided. Sometimes he arrived just moments after her, so she must have disappeared immediately into the bathroom to change after coming home from work. Frank set the bag on the counter and walked over to the cabinet to retrieve some plates and utensils. He set them down and began to scoop out the food when he heard it. Accompanying her soft humming was the gentle lapping of water against the tub.

The sound stopped him in his tracks, and the plate nearly slipped from his hands.

She was taking a bath. Karen Page was naked in the next room, completely unaware of Frank standing in the darkened kitchen not 50 feet away. His mouth dried and his heart dropped into his stomach—and he wasn’t entirely convinced it was due to the fear of her suddenly realizing someone was in the apartment with her. Frank shut his eyes and considered his options. _Three steps ahead._

His first thought was simply to leave. Put the food in the fridge and come back in an hour. Let her relax, and chase away the thoughts in his head. Take a walk and get some much-needed fresh air.

He tried hard to force himself to put this plan into action, but he felt as if the floor had grown vines, rooting him to the spot. All he could think of was Karen, soaked to the bone and blissfully happy in the next room.

Frank never, ever imagined he would feel for a woman what he felt for her. Not after Maria. It scared him how much he caught himself thinking of Karen from day to day, and how much he missed her after being away for an extended period. From that first moment in his hospital room, Karen Page had been his lifeline. She had centered him, woken him up from the stupor he’d put himself in. And since then they had only grown ever closer, culminating in that fateful day in the hotel almost six months before.

He thought about the elevator constantly, despite wishing he wouldn’t. Karen was the one good, bright thing in his life he hadn’t managed to fuck up. The degree to which he wanted her, wished to keep her close, terrified him. He did everything to pretend like his feeling weren’t real, like they would go away if he ignored them hard enough.

Now, listening to her oblivious humming, it was getting harder and harder to pretend like his feelings weren’t genuine. 

Frank swallowed hard, forcing down every thought that entered his brain. _Start over,_ he told himself. _Start the conversation over. Three steps ahead. What is step one?_

Step one was to leave. Frank took a deep breath and began to put the food away, slowly. He tried to ignore the voice in his head.

Wasn’t this what he wanted, though? Wasn’t there a second option? He’d be trying to live a normal life, a healthy life, for almost half a year. He’d been going to group, he had his friends, and he’d gotten a job. Wasn’t this the next step…to be happy? Shouldn’t he lay it all out for her, offer her everything he had, and let her decide? Tell her that sitting around every other week, catching up and eating shitty takeout, acting like she wasn’t the best thing in his life was slowly driving him mad?

Frank knew he had to decide. He hesitated, then stepped forward and flipped on the light, casting the living room into light.

“Karen?” he called, forcing himself to be casual. There was a pregnant pause.

“Y-yeah! Give me a—shit—…” The sound of water sloshing met his ears, “…fuck, hang on! Stay in there!”

Despite himself, despite the anxiousness twisting in his gut, Frank felt himself smile, resuming his job of scooping food as he waited.

–

Karen walked out of the bathroom wearing her traditional flannel pajamas. She had her headphones in her hand, and her hair was piled into a messy bun on top of her head. She smiles at Frank apologetically.

“I’m so sorry, Frank. I totally forgot what today was, and just needed to relax.” Her cheeks were still flushed from the bathwater, and he forced himself to smile back evenly. “Bad day at work, you know.”

“Want me to go? Reschedule?”

“Don’t be silly. What’s that, Thai? Great, I’m starving.” Karen grabbed the plate he offered and a bottle of wine from the fridge. “Grab some glasses?”

When they had settled into a mildly comfortable silence, Frank felt her eyes on him. For a while he could ignore it, but when he finished his first glass of wine, she spoke up. “And I thought I had a rough day.”

Frank shot her a puzzled look, then chuckled awkwardly and set the glass down on the coffee table. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you’ve barely said anything since you got here. You mad I forgot about our date?” He knows she calls their dinners a date. He knows she does it to rile him up, and she’s done it numerous times. Usually she laughs at his expression afterwards. This time she wasn’t joking, and she was watching him carefully. Those blue eyes stared right through him, challenging. Waiting.

Frank set his plate down carefully. He knew this was uncharted territory with them, and he wanted to do it right.

“I’m not going to be enough for you.” It was a warning, a pre-emptive strike. He was trying to be three steps ahead of her, but she only stared at him incredulously.

“…what?”

Frank rubbed his neck, and then turned to look at her. He was a goddamn soldier, and he was taught better than to not keep eye contact with a woman when talking to her. But God, she looked fucking radiant; it was hard to keep his thoughts straight. Her mouth had fallen open in surprise, and her cheeks were flushed with color. Her eyebrows were drawn into a small v that he wanted to smooth out with his thumb. He stared into her eyes, the color of the ocean, and felt like he was drowning in her.

“I’m not going to be good enough for you. Karen,” he repeated. “I just—I just never thought I would feel…anything. Again. Not after Maria. Not after the kids, and Billy, and this fucking _shit storm_ that’s been my life. And then there’s you, yeah?” Frank balled his hands on his thighs to keep from touching her. This was her choice. He would lay everything out for her, and then she got to choose. “And you came in and you, you turned my world upside. Made me look like a fucking idiot. Made me remember. And I can’t ever–…” Frank cleared his throat, voice growing rough with emotion. “I can’t ever thank you enough for that. And I’m not telling you this because I expect _anything_ from you, you hear me? You kick me right out on my ass if you wanna. And–…”

Karen’s hands found one of his fists and she pried open his fingers slowly, carefully. She watched him, waited for him to take a breath.

“Tell me what you’re telling me, Frank. No bullshitting. Just tell me.” Softly. Gently.

Frank met her eyes, and was reminded again that he could never be three steps ahead of this wonderful, intelligent, considerate woman. She was too smart for him, and he was some fucking idiot that was head over heels for her. He swallowed thickly and placed his hand on top of hers, bracing himself.

“I’m never going to be good enough for you…but I’m going to try.”

“Are you sure?” Frank licked his lips, feeling her stare etching itself into his soul, dissecting him, mulling through his words and reading the meaning underneath. He tilted his head in quiet acquiescence, and she leaned forward to meet him halfway. “Tell me you’re sure, Frank,” she whispered, and he felt her breath ghost across his lips.

“Never been more sure of anything,” he told her softly, and like a bolt of lightning he knew it to be true. He knew, as she finally pressed her lips to his, that she was the most solid thing in his life. He knew, as she fisted her hands in his shirt, that he would do anything to keep that promise to her. He knew, as he slipped his arms around her waist, and she murmured his name into his mouth, that no matter what came next he would be by her side.

She’d stayed by his, after all.


End file.
